6 Things I’m Tired of Hearing from Young Republicans

It has become popular these days for young conservatives and Republicans to whine on the Internet about how maligned and misunderstood they are.

That’s fine, I guess. But if we’re going to have a bipartisan conversation, can we at least be less stupid about it?

It’s time to retire some of the most simplistic tropes from this “I’m a conservative and human, too” genre. Here are 6 things I’m tired of hearing from young Republicans.

1. “I’m not anti-gay, I’m just anti-gay marriage./”It’s not a War on Women, it’s a War on Abortion.”/”I’m not anti-immigrant, I only oppose illegal immigration.”


…It’s the same thing. When the fight against same-sex marriage turns into a fight for the right to discriminate, the pro-life movement works to prevent women from getting legally-mandated health insurance coverage, and laws to deport undocumented immigrants actually allow racial profiling against all Latinos, it’s pretty hard to argue the distinction.

2. “I’m fiscally conservative and socially liberal.”


First of all, no, you aren’t. That’s not really a thing. But moreover, if you really cared about the economy, you would be a Democrat.

3. “All lives matter.”


Well, yes, but not all lives are routinely discarded and treated like they don’t matter. This isn’t about you right now.

4. “Liberals are intolerant. You have to respect my opinion, too.”


First of all, it helps when your opinion is backed up by facts. Secondly, it helps when your opinion doesn’t invalidate someone else’s fundamental human rights. And lastly: Wow, doesn’t it suck when your ideas are systematically ignored because of who you are?

5. “Why is it my fault my parents worked hard and were successful?”


It isn’t, but neither is it the fault of Black families in America that they are worth, on average, only six percent as much as a white family, and Latinos only own eight percent of what a white family does. Unless you think Black and Latino people are just inherently less intelligent, hardworking, and talented than white people (in which case, congratulations, you’re a racist), then hard work isn’t the only factor that goes into being successful. It helps if you’re white, and it helps if you start off middle-class or wealthy.

6. “I won’t vote for Drumpf until I have to.”


Enough said.

Jacqui is a terrible dinner party guest—she only knows how to talk about politics and religion. On a typical Friday night, she can be found binge-watching her current Netflix show of choice, playing Civilization: The Board Game and drinking <$8 bottles of champagne.




One thought on “6 Things I’m Tired of Hearing from Young Republicans

  1. This is a piece written without actually giving the other side a voice, or even having the common courtesy of giving them the credit of rational thought. I guess since the vast majority of your pieces have 0 comments, 0 shares, and 0 likes you don’t get much of a soap box, but this one really drives me crazy. The claim about having a rational bipartisan discussion is one I agree with, but the truth of the matter is that you just spent 400 words and six shitty gifs telling the world how stupid we are. In the spirit of having a debate, I’ll do my best to respond to each of your thoughts with my personal views. Oh, and I respect you enough that I will use real sourced articles from unbiased websites to support my facts instead of worthless opinion pieces that read like a 9th grader’s manifesto.

    1. “I’m not anti-gay, I’m just anti-gay marriage./”It’s not a War on Women, it’s a War on Abortion.”/”I’m not anti-immigrant, I only oppose illegalimmigration.”

    I am actually surprised you found anyone who gave you that opinion/ perspective. I would believe it from the older generation, but until you reveal who actually told you these things (instead of the generic “young conservative”) I guess I will just need to trust you. Ok, where to start? This is pretty loaded one to start off with. To keep it short we need to admit a few things: regulation exists for a reason, abortion is an awful thing, and some people truly believe that marriage is between a man and a woman. Now, to get to the political aspect, I (nor any other young conservative) actually think the government should have a say in who gets married or what anyone does in their bedroom or what anyone does to their body. You cannot preach small government and turn around and want this stuff. The federal government should have no right to prevent or encourage abortions, but that doesn’t change that it is ending a life. It is a heavy moral decision that robs someone of an entire lifetime. Oh, and to rub salt in the wound it has become a way for women to express their control over their body. Imagine getting gunned down in the street because someone wanted to prove their second amendment right. Its awful.

    As for immigration, I (and most young conservatives) don’t blame “those damned Mexicans” for anything- except coming here illegally. We regulate immigration from all over the world, why are you so against punishing those who violate our rules? Normally we can control variables like the education level, are they convicted criminals, are they healthy, can they work, and the pursuit of a path to citizenship. America is built on the back of immigrants, my family and yours. But the truth of the matter is this: the world isn’t a fair place and rules exist for a reason. Just because you roll poorly in monopoly doesn’t give you the right to move six spaces and avoid Park Place. Oh, and considering that SB1070 died and was nationally declared as an insult to America I don’t think you have the right to source it. I am all for increasing the number of immigrants we allow from Mexico and other Latin and South American countries, but with the appropriate regulatory aspects increased as well. (Note: I find it funny that young liberals are often pro wall street regulation, but anti immigration regulation. Pick a side!)

    2. “I’m fiscally conservative and socially liberal”

    Yes, that is a thing. I think of myself this way. All I want is for people to learn economics 101 before we talk about this, especially the bumps democratic presidents have had- they are often more economically minded than their conservative counterparts. Misunderstanding and misrepresenting the evidence doesn’t make you right.

    3. “All lives matter”

    I found it ironic that you used a Hillary gif here- the “Super predator” herself! Yes, all lives matter. Yes, black lives matter. I just wish people would shut down cities when the cops in Mesa gun down an innocent man (white) as often and with as much enthusiasm as when cops shoot criminals who attack cops. Everyone is a person, a death is tragic no matter what color the skin is. Maybe when talking about how cops kill more black people than any other demographic we should also bring up crime rate statistics- Black people commit 85% of violent crimes (https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Race_and_crime_in_the_United_States) and 93% of black murder is commit by black citizens. This is as much (if not more) an issue about poverty and education as it is about “whose lives matter”.

    4. “Liberals are intolerant/ my feelings are hurt!”

    Welcome to our world, where incessant complaining gets in the way of progress. We need to respect each others opinions, something this piece does not do. In fact, this piece is a toxic work of groupthink that actively tries to break down relations between young conservatives and liberals- when we aren’t even that far apart to begin with.

    5. My parents are rich, waaaa

    No, no one is at fault for being rich or poor. There are assholes everywhere. Of course it helps if you are born rich, but that still doesn’t give you the right to blame people for it- unless you’re also ok with claiming that poor people are at fault for their own poverty and “failure” (in your own words, congratulations you’re racist).

    6. Voting for trump

    This election cycle I have constantly been treated better by trump supporters than anyone else. Bernie supporters block my roads, demand a raise in taxes (without readjusting spending or the tax code itself), call me racist, and tell me my success is not my own because I’m white, and spew economics that anyone who passed econ 200 knows is inane. Ted Cruz is the zodiac killer and Hillary Clinton is bought and paid for by the big banks. Trump funds his own campaign and at least his will is his own. He may be crazy, but he and I agree on some things- and I bet you would agree with them too if you’d look past your own bias.

    I know this probably wont change your mind or even make you blink. In fact, I bet you are listing the oh so many ways I am wrong and/or your rebuttal, if you even write one (wasn’t this article labeled as a debate?) as you read through this. Please, just know that we are people too. Having a different opinion than you is ok. People existing in the world that don’t agree with you and talking with them is actually a major key to global progress. So, are you a progressive or not?

    Liked by 1 person

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