Basic Bitch Diaries: Teatox Fail

Curious what this is all about? Read the introduction to the Basic Bitch Diaries here and read last week’s food diary here

In my online millenial life, I have seen these “teatoxes” and “skinny teas” on seemingly every form of social media (usually because a celebrity was paid to talk about them). These teas have crazy claims, which, according to the BaeTea website, includes:

  • Boosting your metabolism and helping you burn fat
  • “Calming” and “cleansing” your body
  • Giving you energy and elevating your mood
  • Aiding in digestion
  • Promoting fullness and suppressing appetite
  • Eliminating toxins released from fat cells during weight loss.

All of this sounds too good to be true, because it probably is. Still, in the name of sciencec2pkexxxgaax1v9 and All Things Basic, I decided to give it a shot.

The main ingredient in these detox teas is
senna leaf, aka an herbal laxative. From everything I’ve read online, basically all that this mind-blowing tea actually does is make you poop more, which means losing weight via losing waste. Fun!

Going into this experiment, I thought I would be updating this teatox diary daily, but then realized a few things:

  1. My teatox experience isn’t going to differ greatly from day to day, and
  2. I don’t feel like detailing my bowel movements on a daily basis on the internet.

The Results

I’m sad (happy?) to report that the teatox has not made a significant difference in my weight loss after trying it for 10 days.

No, I didn’t do the full 14 days, because I saw no difference. It wasn’t helping “flush out” my system or making me go to the bathroom more frequently. I didn’t make me feel more energized, and I got the same results – if not better results – from just drinking one cup of coffee in the morning.

I’ll include a link to an article at Shape that explains the myths and facts a bit more than I can, but I would not repurchase this so-called “miracle” product again. I’ll stick to drinking coffee and earl grey out of my cat-flipping-you-off mug, thank you very much.

Overall Thoughts

Total pounds lost: 5

How I feel about my New Year’s Resolution: Stuck. It has been nearly a month of dieting and having only lost 5 pounds feels a bit discouraging, but the failed teatox experiment just reminds me I have to keep working and not look for quick solutions. I have started going to the gym again and am hoping to see more results with exercise incorporated into my routine – stay tuned!


Mia is an aspiring cat lady and obsessed with books, beauty, and pop culture. By day she works in publishing in New York City, and by night she can be found in bed, drinking Moscato and binge-watching YouTube videos.

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